So today is an “out with the old and in with new” kind of day, this is the kind of day that inspired Britney Spears to shave her head bald (that and Kevin Federline), the kind of day that chanelled Angelina Jolie’s inner whore and made her steal Brad Pitt from Jennifer Aniston, yep, its that kind of day.
Out with semi-emo posts about lost love, heartbreak and stupid girls, and in with the frivolous and nonsensical. What’s todays post about then? Tequilla. My 8 favourite letters after make-up sex. Ok, that’s not eight letters but I had to sneak it in there somehow!
So in the spirit of this “Anything goes” kind of day I broke up with Tequilla. And no, that’s not some pseudo-name for another worthless dipshit , I broke up with Jose Cuervo. Like all good girls, I like bad boys. I like them big, and rough and generally quick- nothing says stupid like actually dating a bad boy.
So you can see why Tequilla was my drink of choice- Its like a leather clad bad boy in a shot, it was love at first sight. Tequilla helped me stagger my way through high school but alas, now it was threatening to help me crawl my way through varsity. #unprofessional.
So like any good girl who’s clearly out of her depth, I ran. By ran, I mean I lay in my bed till three in the afternoon trying to piece my night together! So its over.
Gone are the days of drunken table dancing, falling behind the DJ booth and forgetting who I hooked up with the previous night. Gone are the days of half-spoken, half-slurred conversations and embarrassing drunk dials.
Now you’re probably thinking “Bitch get a diary”, Its just Tequilla? But Tequilla is an important part of my life. Yes, I sound like an alcoholic. Sue me. Or better yet, pass me my Lemon and my Cuervo.